To mangle the words of the great Shakespeare “To be invisible or not be invisible that is the question?”

I’m talking about the most embarrassing thing in the world. Well to men. The Menopause.

I have been into the unknown and come out alive.

A member of a boy band said he would like to make love to a mature woman “but not one of those menopausal woman.” I was outraged not because he didn’t want a menopausal woman but because he was presumptuous enough to believe that a fully functioning menopausal woman would want an immature man-boy who only thinks with his cock.

Lets hope he never accidentally meets one; he could end up slinking off with his cock between his legs. Snigger

There isn’t a lot of sympathy for the menopause, young women find it too horrific to talk about, it’s like talking about death. Men find themselves dying of uncomfortable-ness; the symptoms include squirming, staring into space and finally making an excuse to leave the immediate area.

I didn’t have a clue what the hell was happening to me when I first started feeling tearful and very hot. I didn’t have a clue why my legs would jump at night; yes I had seen a decrease in my period but that didn’t bother me because I had always hated having periods.

I know why some women feel as if it is the end of the road because they are no longer able to have children? It’s the end of the road, might as well give up, blah, blah, blah. Not to be too blasé some women have a hell of a time of it all and I’m sorry for that.

Back to me.

I don’t bloody want anymore kids, for the first time in my life I’m able to make decisions about myself without anyone else telling me what I should be doing, what I should look like, what I should say.

All research points towards older people being happier and more fulfilled. It’s true just don’t stare at the new middle-aged face too much.

When I was younger I remember being fascinated by older woman. I was fascinated by their confidence, fascinated that my boyfriend’s found older woman attractive. I loved the way they dressed and moved and seemed able to engage and beguile men who are all meant to feel attracted to younger woman.

I look at younger woman now and see their awkwardness, I relish the feeling that that is not happening to me anymore. I’m just confident.
In lots of cases breaking out from the same old routines. I have left my house after 30 years of raising children; I left with 3 bags and even less baggage.

In the months since I have left, I’ve lived on a houseboat. I had to leave the boat because the lady I shared with smoked over a hundred cigarettes a day. After living in the same property for some many years I was able to say “oh no I’m out of here.” Now I’m living with a fantastic much younger woman than me and her husband, they look after me like I’ve never been looked after before. It’s my time, hip, hip hooray.

I am a great big lover of Hormone Replacement Therapy; I know it has its detractors but the vast majority of ladies who take it consider it a miracle. For the first time in our lives we are able to control hormones and moods. Imagine that!!!

Ok I can’t lie there are some downsides to it. Aching bones, not being able to sit all afternoon without realising that I have just woken up from a sneaky little nap. I know some woman say they feel invisible but come on that’s up to you. To mangle the words of the great Shakespeare ‘To be invisible or not be invisible that is the question’

WARNING: Try taking HRT off a happily pill popping woman, you do so at your own risk.

photo by Matthew G


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